Beating up on yourself increases caregiver stress
Caring for an older adult is tough – physically, mentally, and emotionally.
The way we treat ourselves can add to that stress.
How many times have you beat yourself up for a small mistake or for not being able to meet an impossible goal?
This added emotional stress contributes to caregiver burnout.
Being hard on yourself is only natural. You want the best for your older adult and you’re pushing yourself to the max in order to give it to them.
But it’s also important to realize that being hard on yourself increases stress and makes it more difficult to sustain caregiving in the long run.
To help you be kinder to yourself and reduce stress, we found 18 quick and simple self-compassion tools from a leading psychologist.
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How self-compassion helps caregivers
Self-compassion means giving the same kindness and sympathy to yourself as you would give to a good friend.
Psychologist Dr. Kristin Neff is an expert in self-compassion.
Her research finds that people who are compassionate to themselves are less likely to be depressed, anxious, or stressed. They’re also more likely to be happy, resilient, and optimistic about the future.
Think of the way you’d talk to your friend and contrast that with how you normally talk to yourself. Pretty different, right?
Having self-compassion basically means being nicer to yourself – a sure way to feel better, no matter what else is going on around you.
26 self-compassion tools reduce caregiver stress
Dr. Neff’s website has 26 free resources to help you practice self-compassion.
18 guided meditations These 18 guided meditations make it easy to get started with meditation.
Just find a quiet place and play the recording. The soothing voice will guide you through a relaxing exercise.
The meditations range from as 5 to 24 minutes in length. They’re a great way for busy caregivers to take much-needed mental breaks. Choose a meditation »
8 self-compassion exercises Take a look at these 8 exercises and see which ones call out to you. Each is a quick and simple way to show yourself some kindness.
1. How would you treat a friend? This exercise helps you think about how you would talk to a friend who needs support and then helps you apply that same compassion to yourself. Give it a try »
2. Take a self-compassion break This exercise helps you pause and regroup when you’re feeling stressed. Give this a try »
3. Explore self-compassion through writing
This exercise helps you write a compassionate letter to yourself about something you’re struggling with.
Give this a try »
Advertisement 4. Role-play the criticizer, the criticized, and the compassionate observer In this exercise, you sit in 3 different chairs to help get in touch with different parts of yourself – the criticizer, the criticized, and the compassionate observer.
It might sound silly, but it does help you get a different perspective on how you’re feeling. Give this a try »
5. Change critical self-talk We often speak harshly to ourselves and blame ourselves unfairly.
This exercise helps you notice when it’s happening and how to gradually change those thoughts. Give this a try »
6. Self-compassion journal A daily journal helps you process the difficult events of your day.
When you have a few quiet moments, this gives you a chance to review the day’s events and write down anything you felt bad about, judged yourself for, or difficult experiences that caused you pain. Give this a try »
7. Identify what you really want Be aware of when you use self-criticism as a way to motivate you.
This exercise helps you reframe the way you talk to yourself, more like how a supportive friend would encourage you. Give this a try »
8. Take care of the caregiver This exercise helps people who care for others take care of themselves too. It encourages you to find ways to recharge and meet your own needs. Give this a try »
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By DailyCaring Editorial Team Image: The CLR Group
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